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January 28 dang!I wonder sometimes at my own ineptitude. Today I took a day off specifically to go get my bloodwork to check my thyroid levels. I got ready and then went to where I had placed the doctor's order. Not there. Not in my work bag with any of the paperwork I take with me to get done there. Not any of the usual places I put important papers. What in the world? I am soooo weird sometimes. I just looked at it the other day to see if I had to fast or not. Ah well, will call the doctor and ask for another one and reschedule. The testing site has a fairly flexible schedule so it shoudn't be too hard to get back to it.
Will enjoy the day off. I am going out to walk in a few minutes. That should help my mood considerably. I haven't walked other than the job on Saturday in a while and I miss it. The temps this week are supposed to be in the 40s with some days in the higher 40s. Yay, that means more wlaking and maybe we won't be too uncomfortable until we get more oil. I want to get plastic to put over my windows. It seems like we are going through more oil than I think we should be. Anything that can cut down on that will be good. The porgramable thermostat helps alot - it goes to 63 at night and 67 when everyone is in the house and out of bed.
The house is quiet. The girls are back at their respective schools and Eddie is not home much. I guess we'll be going through college kids home/away cyel for a while. We'll all be used to it at some point. Colleen sent me a sweet email last night. Long and full of the details on her new semester. She is thinking about changing majors. Her jouranlism prof was enough of an anal dictator that she dropped that class. She loved the class last semester, which is waht makes me concerned about changi=ng her major. Col is looking at film and mass media which is related and I can see her enjoying. She has always been into different media and has an artistic eye. She is laso a bit of a computer whiz, so I can see her doing that as well. Ultimately, it is Colleen's discision. I just want it to be a good one for her in the long run.
Well, time to get going.
January 27 Laughin' babiesLast night, I spent about an hour watching youtube and looking at laughing baby videos. It was so much fun and got me in the best mood. How can you be blue at all after watching babies belly laugh? I don't think it's possible. There are lots of other things I could have been doing, but honestly pulling myself out of the doldrums was well worth it.
Yesterday, I had a job at 8 in the morning. It was kind of a pain to get up and out that early, especially since the wind chill was about 17. Bundled up though so it wasn't all that bad. The commitee was doing a walk through of a disc golf course. The walk is a good challenge and it looks like the game itself is a lot of fun. I got my exercise in and got paid to do so. How cool is that. It was fun.... I do think that it wiped me out though. By 7:00pm I was ready for bed. My legs are pretty sore today. I did find out that I think I like hiking.
We also had the family January birthdays - Jamie, Colleen and my brother Jim's. It was fun to see everyone. Everyone really enjoyed the asian buffet.. there was a variety of good food, something for everyone. Unless you have a food allergy. I tried to be careful. Even brought a cake. Somehow, I must have eaten something with dairy in it on 2 occassions. My girls noticed at different times. By the time I got home, my face had bumps - they were neither pimples nor hives but boy did they look ugly. Still, I enjoyed being with everyone. Colleen really liked the gifts she got from us - even the subway tokens she asked for. Jamie had seen the one and only thing she asked for - a vacuum when I picked her up from school. My niece Erin made a neat scrap book for my brother with pictures from when we were all kids. (and before our parents were married in addition) It was so much fun and I truly enjoyed it.
Today, Jamie, my sister and I had a marathon shopping expedition. First we hit Joanne's fabrics, then a really good thrift store. Jamie got about 6 items of clothing for $20. I got 2 sweaters for $5.25. Not too shabby at all. I was getting tired of wearing the same old clothes over and over again lately. Now I have 2 sweaters that are new to me. After that, we went grocery shopping. That was about average, but we got a new cashier that took forever to chose where to put everything. I understand that everyone has to start somewhere... it just seemed like they left him on his own too soon. Just got home from dropping Jamie off. The ride wasn't bad - no traffic really.
We're out of heating oil again. I'm having a hard time with the higher prices this year trying to keep up. And of course, I make "too much" to qualify for any help. Peachy. So I either pay for oil or pay my mortage. At an impasse. It'll work out somehow.
Taking tomorrow off. Having my thyroid levels checked. Something that has to be done every 6 months apparently. Looking forward to sleeping in a bit. After the blood test, I'll walk as it is supposed to be nice then hit Wally mart to pick up a few things.
Going to go crawl under my covers.
January 21 lost postShoulda seen the post that got away! I typed up a short post yesterday, but couldn't post it or save it. Kind of weird.
Took Colleen back to school yesterday. She was really excited about going back. It was a shame it was so dang cold out yesterday. We all felt like any time you were outside you had to move as quickly as possible to get back inside. She had alot of things to take back, but it was not outrageous. By the ammount of stuff she and her room-mate took back you would think they had been gone a year rather than a month. Oh well. Colleen is excited about her classes and I am hoping she gets the job at Saxby's. She can obviously barrista with the best of them and it would be good if she didn't have to spend money coming home weekends to work. (and only working weekends) Bummer this morning - Col called to tell me her beta fish died. She had had him since about May of her junior year of hs. Poor Ernest.
Didnt get all that much accomplished over the weekend. Did get Col back to school. She had asked me to make knock off Olive Garden Pasta E Fajiole (sp?) soup so she could take some back with her. Yesterday was mostly driving and moving... guess I am amking excuses. Oh, I got another scarf done. I have found a few organizations who'll take hand made items. It's a good mix - refugees, domestic/sexual abuse victims, and foster care... hopefully this week I can work on sending them all out. (3 scarves and a child sized afgan) I have some stuff to do around the hosue, but I'm mostly just going to relax today. January 18 Friday, yay!Gotta love Friday! (unless you have a week that has an alternate weekend like Sun and Mon off) I love that other than setting the alarm to make sure Eddie was awake and moving at 6:10, I could be a bit of a bum and lounge in bed for a while. Yes, I AM lazy! Guess that's not the worst fault to have.
My days off won't be totally unproductive though. I have a job at 2:30 today. Pretty sure it is a baby check... the write up only said medical check. Either way, it is a nice short assignment. I will probably spend more time driving than actually working. Monday evening I have another job - same place and person as a few weeks ago where the meeting was only supposed to be 30-40 minutes and ended up more than 2.5 hours. Last night I had another job about 2.5 miles from home. Union discussion and voting on a contract.
It took me little more than a half hour to drive 2.5 miles. We finally got some snow. By the end of today it will probably all be melted - the temps are supposed to be in the mid 40s today. I was surprised it was such slow going yesterday. It was rush hour, but the roads were pretty covered and people were actually driving carefully for once. Leave it to me to wear the wrong shoes. I ended up having to park across the street from the catering place where the meeting was held. I had on thsese cute little flats... the ones I had on when Jerry and I stopped at a Lake Erie beach and all the sand kept going in my shoes? Yeah, them. I didn't want to wear my boots - figured they wouldn't look nice enough for a job. Oh no, better to try and walk through snow and slush and try to cross a street no less. Who's really bright sometimes? Me!
The rest of my weekend will be trying to fit a little fun with Colleen in before she goes back to school on Sunday, shopping and she asked me to make her the knock off Olive Garden Pasta e Fajole soup to take back with her. I think we are both ready for her to go back. It has been really nice having her home and I will miss her again when she goes back. Still, I think we get on each other's nerves from time to time.
That's about it. Just trying to get some things done and be as positive as possible. Happy Friday!
Oh, Lynesy - My interest in interpreting came in high school. We read a book called In this Sign and saw a video that discussed the struggle between advocates of a signed education or an education using only lip reading and speech. The book followed the life of a deaf couple. Looking back now, it was pretty melodramatic. The National Theatre of the Deaf was in the video, and I thought signing was pretty cool. After graduating high school, I took Sign Language classes once a week at the Pa School for the Deaf, then spent a summer at Gallaudet University studying sign for an intensive 6 weeks. It all just took off from there. I found that I had a knack for learning to sign and to interpret... and the rest as they say is history. Weird to think I've been doing this for about 26 years! (I must be old!!) January 16 4 day weekend coming!Looking forward to having a 4 day break this weekend. The district our program is in has an inservice day on Friday. Since the IU people start earlier than the district people we do not have to go on Friday! Woohoo! I do have a 2 hour job in the afternoon, but the worst part of that will be the traveling there and back. I will probably be working Saturday afternoon, too but that's alright as well. A few extra dollars is a good thing. Sunday, I will be taking Colleen back to school. Even that won't be all that intensive or anything.
Nothing really new happening. Work is a little hectic... it is nearing the end of the 2nd marking period. The quarterly exams started today, so that skews the schedule a bit. I will miss at least 2 of my first semester classes. I love the Honors Art class. The teacher there encourages higher level thinking skills and gets some amazing art outta the kids. The other is my public speaking class. The teacher is very high energy and excited about she is teaching. The mix of kids is pretty cool..... freshmen to seniors, jocks, nerds, etc but they get along REALLY well and seem to genuinely like each other. Who knows though, 2nd semester may be just as fun. So far, I ahve not gotten any offers from eother of the 2 major agencies to interpret any evening college classes. That would have been perfect for me... a little extra money without having to be out more than 2 nights a week. Ah well... maybe summer semester.
No new news on the Bill front. I contacted victims' services to see if there was anything available for the kids. Nothing really. There are some counseling and support group opportunities, but they are geared toward kids involved in violent crimes or whose parents are incarcerated for something other than non payment of childsupport. For now, I keep a close eye on them and the communication open. We shall see what happens from there.
Trying to keep busy. When I'm not, my mind has more of a chance to wonder and worry. Walking was nice today. I think it was about 40 minutes. It was cold enough that it took me about 30 to feel warm. I usually underdress a little knowing I will watm up after about 10 minutes of walking. That didn't happen today and it wasn't really all that cold. Weird.
Past mid-week.... yay! January 11 time to thinkAmazing how a few days can put things in better perspective. I have gotten over the initial shock of the news of this week. I have been sorting through information and feelings. Oh feelings...they can change at the drop of a hat and just are.
Bill.... he's a wreck through and through. When we met, he was this up and coming 1st class petty officer moving up the enlisted ranks quickly. He sang and played 6 and 12 string guitar. He acted in a play on base and did well. It seemed his family was whole and cohesive. He was extremely romanitc and our "courtship" moved along very rapidly. My, how looks can be deceiving. Now? I look at some divorced parents and marvel at the fact that they are civil and have a relationship that is condusive to putting the kids first and looking out for their welfare. It astounds me people do that because it is worlds different than our situation.
First and foremost, I was concerned about how my kids would feel after hearing this latest news. I do not think any of them have had any contact with him since he went to jail. Bill's mom tried to get the girls to go out there and do something with his bank card. Colleen made it clear she wanted nothing to do with it. Jamie reminded her grandmother that she does not have a car. I remembered that Bill had $400 from his dad when we had the hearing. $400 - $6500, it's all the same. He really shoudn't need all that much money there. The kids haven't really said all that much around me, other than when Colleen and Liam were going back and forth with comments to each other about how pathetic he has become. How incredibly stupid he acts and how he has no idea how his actions effect others. They were dead on.
I don't think I will ever have any doubts or hesitations about what a piece of scum Bill is. There is no compassion left in my heart for him whatsoever. There's a quote I saw some time ago that said the opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference. Aside from how whatever happens to him effects everyone except him, I can just no longer care. He deserves not one iota of my time, effort or caring. The only good things that came out of our relationship as far as I can see are my children, the lessons and strength I have gathered along the way from these experiences and that is it.
My two blog buddies have been kind enough to hope that in some way he sees the light. To realize what he has done to all of the kids, including Deirdre's and maybe get himself together. The path he is on now has damaged any bond that was there for some of my kids... the ones that still wanted some kind of relationship with him I fear will have to face further heartache. His health? Emotionally he is so under-developed at this point that I think he would need some major psychotherapy. His physical health? When we split in 1994, he had borderline high blood pressure. Jamie tells me he now has diabetes. His mom has heart disease. When I last saw him, he looked at least 55 rather than 48. I don't see good things down the road. The "hot" urine test? How's that for smart? He was in a rehab place for alcoholism in 1990... which he didn't really think he needed. Where does someone on welfare get money for drugs? In jail? I dunno. This is a completely different paradigm for me, and it makes no sense. As another human being, I hope he gets whatever help he needs before it is too late.
The week had some bright spots. I went and interpreted what was supposed to be a 30-40 minute parks and recreation board meeting for a neighboring township. There was some hot debate about a disc golf course that is already up and running. I finally had to leave after 2.5 hours. It had been straight, non stop interpreting. My hands were numb from my pinkies to my middle fingers and my brain was mush. The good thing about it was that it was a freelance job and it felt good to be "out there" and do a good job. Another good thing was one of the deaf consumers there. The man is absolutely brilliant. He is working on a project teaching emergency service workers how to communicate and make services accessible to hard of hearing and deaf residents. (in cooperation with the dept of homeland security) His comments at the meeting were down right elegant. I was blown away by his knowledge base and ability to address a group of prople. I am stoaked about my future out there out of the K-12 educational setting.
Something else got me this week.... in Health class they were finishing the stages of fetal devlopement and the birthing process. The teacher I work with selected some videos from youtube and the like to illustrate Ceasarian and home births. She was careful to pick out as modest and tastefully done videos as possible. There montages of pictures of babies at the end of each one. I love babies... and thought that while I watched (there was no narration during this part) then started thinking about my own "babies"... how gorgeous and wonderful they were when they were adorable little bundles and the beautful and spectacular people they are now. I am sometimes blown away by what neat souls they are - they are good people with so much to offer and yes I am exceedingly proud. Now I just need to make sure they know that. Oh, and I teared up a little during Health thinking about all that.
That's just the way I am. :-) January 10 no news is good news?Nothing really new or anything. I called my federal investigator and left a message asking that he call me back. Nothing yet, but the man does have a job that he does everyday. So we shall see.
The whole thing is just plain ole sad. I have very little compassion left for him at all. I don't wish him ill per se, I just don't care. Have only told one kiddo so far, Colleen. She was not surprised.
Couple things to do before I go to bed. January 09 what in tarnation!Ya gotta believe I wanted to use stronger language than the title! Alrighty... so I FINALLY get a payment processed from Billy-lump-lump's work release program while he is in jail. This only happened after I called and asked what was up - a garnishment order had only been out in place on Dec. 11... the man has been there since Oct 26! So the hearing officer's secretary said that after my inquiry last week she double checked that the order was never recieved. Nope! No one checks on this stuff unless you pester them all the time.. how about doing something really crazy and doing your job???? my goodness. So, she faxed another order and voile I see a payment in the system today. I am grateful for any help I can get.
FF to today. I am happy, as I got the notice of the payment being in the system this morning in my email - yay! I get another email. This one is from the system I signed up for through victims' services that will inform you when an offender is released or moved. MY notice from the victims' serivce system says Bill was released today. What in the world. So, I call the ever so wonderful secretary AGAIN.
She's at a loss. First, I ask her if there is any remedy for the garnishment order not taking effect untill last week or today. Nope. (too bad for you and your kids... who cares if he's been incarcerated for over 2 months with the specific intent of having him have to work) I was doing my best to control my temper. Then I tell her I got a notification that he was released. She says she has no indication of that in her system - it might not be there yet. I was proud that I did not lose it then and there... I just calmly reminded her that the jail and her department were both county agencies AND if I had gotten notification, it had to be in the system somewhere.
We ended the call with her telling me she would look into it. I waited about 50 minutes, and she called back. She said he was picked up by federal marshalls that would be taking him to the Federal Court in Philadelphia. I explained to her (and why do I have to regurgitate the same info 1,000,000 times?!) that Bill had been charged on Federal charges of non support and plead guilty in about 2003. (it's actually 2004) She admitted she didn't know anything about working with the federal enforcement people. Gosh, can you give me any more confidence in your agency?? Why in the heck would they put this federal law in place and have no vehicle for liason with the local folk?
It gets better... I have sign on criteria to look at the federal info here at home. I had to wait til after work, but I logged on.... They brought him back to Federal Court as he violted his Federal Parole. The violation is listed as a "hot" urine test. HOW INCREDIBLY STUPID IS THIS MAN? He had notice of his local enforcement hearing well ahead of time and he did whatever within enough time it would come up positive? Was he depending on NOT going to jail after that Oct 26th hearing, going home or to Texas and not having his PO find it? They haven't been all that effecient from what I've seen, so that I cannot fault him for. Or.... did he do something AFTER he was put in jail????? So unbeliveably stupid.... and it's sad. He's just an incredibly sad sack of you know what. In addition to the 6 months he is to serve here in my county, he now has a 3 month stay in a half way house ordered by the federal court when he is released.
What does he think? (if he ever does actually think) What in heaven's name did I see in him so long ago? Good gravy. One more great things to have to tell my kiddos at some point.
On a nice note-the weather has been beautiful and I have been walking alot. Today I am giving myself a day off. Think I need a little break. Also, Colleen qualified for another loan so she can go back to her college. Double yay!! I am very ahppy about that for her. January 06 new years' stuffWell, even before the New Years started, I got myself in gear with a few things. Have been walking about every other day. I am up to about 40-43 minutes and have been enjoying it. It's a great stress reducer and a good way to get back into exercising. There's an indoor track at work, so if it's too outrageously cold outside I can walk there. Much prefer outside though. My little Ipod shuffle helps. It's nice to be able to listen to some tunes while walking.
I started cleaning a little here and there in the house. If I think about the whole thing and how much stuff is in it, it is overwhelming... so I try not to do that! It should be easier when Col goes back to school. Oh and IF Eddie darling gets his butt moving as well. Still, I can do what I can do.
December 31 was the end of my four year cycle to earn CEUs to maintain my interpreting certification. You need 80 hours worth. Not too difficult....unless what you thought would count does not. I took and English Comp. II class that I assumed would count for professional studies. After all, it is improving my source language competencies. I found out mid-November that it would be put toward General Studies...what? So... I started reading a book on Deaf People in Hitler's Europe and doing a paper in case I couldn't get the ruling changed. I appealed the ruling and won! Woohoo! Saw my transcript about Thursday of last week - with the classes I took, it added up to 14!!!! Yeah. I will be finishing the book and paper and submitting that as a start for my new cycle. Not waiting untill toward the end of this cycle to make sure I am alright. That was wayyyyy to nerve wracking!
My Jamie turned 21 this past Thursday. How did that happen? I can still remember her as the sweet baby with big beautiful blue eyes. She still has the big beuatiful blue eyes... and is a wonderful person. I'm very proud of her and still in awe of the fact that she's my kiddo. (that all of them are really) She had a little fun - her roommates took her out at about 12:03 Jan. 3 and she said she had 3 drinks. The next night she went out with a gift card she got from her regular job at school. Thursday though she started not feeling well. Has a stomach thing which stinks. Anyway... we will celebrate her and Colleen's bdays in a few weeks.
That's about all for right now. Want to get some laundry going and get out to walk. January 01 January 1, 2008 So... am I the only one who will have trouble remembering to write 2008 on everything? Hey, if that's the worst part of my day then not so bad I think.
Hope your 2008 is wonderful! |
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